03 August 2011

catcallin' while strollin' on city sidewalks...

as i grow older, the catcalls are not as obvious. i would like to think that is because of the more informed, aware and mature male folk. i am getting older, so i do think some of the catcalls are getting reserved for the younger generation. ugh. that is a burden i do not want to pass onto my younger sister-folk.

i noticed two types today as i was walking, rather fast, to meet up with a friend after saying goodbye to another friend:

1. three guys walking on the sidewalk as i am walking towards them. the three exchange glances as i power on through. the guys, being a bit older themselves, say, "hello," "hi, have a good night." i have to say, this is the more mature catcall, so when males say this to me, i do respond to try to have this positive reinforcement for all females who are walking about their business. i say, "thanks, have a good night." revolutionary? perhaps. i like to think that the guys may have had some talking to in the past as to what is and is not appropriate. i did hear them chatter about me as i walked past, but it wasn't derogatory.

2. there were another set of three guys hanging out together as i continued walking. (all of this catcalling was on the same block, i might add). i was still processing the relative politeness of the last "catcall" when one of these three said, "wow." they all looked at me up and down like i was a piece of meat when i passed. i walked by them without saying a word. the one that said "wow" presumably said, "did she hear me?" and they were like, "no, i don't think so." and he said, "but she looked at us out of the corner of her eye." and i did. cause grossssssssssss. and then the other two were assuring him as i shuffled away that i hadn't heard him and i wasn't looking at him.

why would they want to encourage that catcall other than he, perhaps saw me as a passive piece of meat that would not respond. and i didn't, but not because i'm passive. he was exercising his male power in our masculine society that puts me on the bottom, and i do not like being singled out for being female. (SPOILER ALERT TO HETERO MALES: no women do, mkay? so don't even try.)

this is why if you are going to catcall me for appreciating my curves, or me being lower on your perceived hierarchy of things to assert your power over....just be nice. say, "have a nice evening," and be on your merry fucking way. that way i can also wish that you "have a nice evening for not singling me out for being a piece of meat pathetic female" without wanting to rip your adams apple from your throat.

and on that note (hey, that rhymes....), good night.


petrus said...

The wind brings me here from a fellow blog.
As a heteromale, I want to throw in my 2 cents. I could be wrong, but my inclination is that if you engage the catcallers, but own them, you'll teach them the best lesson. So, what I mean is, look them in the eye, not smiling, but letting them know you despise what they're doing, and say something to acknowledge their presence without ceding control or offering anything to them. Something like "Good morning, gentlemen. Rough times lately?" [as in tough time getting a decent girl by acting like that] or "Good morning, men. Not much excitement in your lives, is there?" I donno. Like I said, my 2 cents.

calitexican said...

interesting. i have been known to stare them down before, but not saying anything. not saying these times are often, but next time it happens, will try one of these on for size. i'll do my best to report back.