this article explains the epitome of what i'm attempting to do these past few months. close the doors in my head, do the emotional dump i need to do, experience the loss and then move on. enough already. am closer than i've ever been.
The Advantages of Closing a Few Doors
"Apparently they did not care so much about maintaining flexibility in the future. What really motivated them was the desire to avoid the immediate pain of watching a door close.
“Closing a door on an option is experienced as a loss, and people are willing to pay a price to avoid the emotion of loss,” Dr. Ariely says. In the experiment, the price was easy to measure in lost cash. In life, the costs are less obvious — wasted time, missed opportunities. If you are afraid to drop any project at the office, you pay for it at home."